But I Am A Genius
by Omega-Red9
Summary: COMPLETE! This is my personal argument trying to convince myself that Numbuh 4 isn't a complete moron. Tell me your opinion in the review section.
1. The Question

Ok, let me start off by saying that I don't KND. Wish I did, but I don't. Now, second of all, I would like to explain what I am trying to do here. When I hear people call Numbuh 4 "the dumb one" I get a little frustrated. I am trying to write this 2 part story as a way to explain his true genius. I have never written anything like this, so bear with me while I work on it ok. Now on with the show.

But I Am A Genius

Part 1

By OmegaRed9

The air was stale and grey. The environment seemed to scream boredom, and it was not much different in the KND tree house. With the drizzle coming down outside all of the operatives were confined to the arbor dwelling. The rain and lack of adult activity allowed all of the weary operatives a moment of rest. Unfortunately they had a lot of homework to do since they have been going on a lot of missions lately. They didn't have time to do it in the previous days and had a large amount due. All of the pre-pubescent agents were lying in different corners of the briefing room working on different subjects.

Numbuh 1 was working on his literature homework. Being a Brit and an articulate speaker, he chose a fellow British poet to write a report on. He felt that he had a lot in common with William Blake, and he looked up to him, sometimes reading his poetry for inspiration when he needed it. The constant battle that he fought between an innumerable yet unorganized mass and a disassociated hierarchy often hit a chord with him. He often found himself writing poetry very similar to Blake's, not that he would EVER admit to that. He was too much of a loner to ever get close enough to someone to ever actually show them his personal feelings.

Much of his poetry revolved around his anger with, not only adults, but the lack of control that the KND global command had over its forces. A well tuned machine such as his team should have no trouble receiving orders from above, yet it always seemed that the higher-ups would just hand over crucial information to people who didn't need it, like Lizzie, or give it far too late. It was always frustrating for Numbuh 1 when he got blamed for a communication problem on their end. The only thing he could do though is just grin and bare it. That and write a poem about it in his quickly growing notebook.

Numbuh 2 was working on a huge science project. Not huge size-wise, but huge in the sense that a large portion of his grade would be depending on his ability to pass with flying colors. He was trying not to use his knowledge of 2x4 technologies to prove that one could travel faster than light. He knew he could do it with his abilities as a 2x4 engineer, but he was not allowed to apply those skills outside the KND. The fear that the tech would fall into adult hands was always a worry, and for that reason he was having a bit of trouble with proving his theories.

He was the self-proclaimed genius of the team and it was his responsibility to maintain that title. If he could not defend himself in the here and now, he would be the laughing stock of the fourth grade (that is the grade they are in right?). Numbuh 2 didn't want to admit it, but he secretly chuckles at how hard everyone else has to work at doing work that he would consider less than mediocre for himself. He knew that sort of made him a total douche, but he couldn't help it. He was never good at anything else, so he always figured that if this is the only thing he is good at, why not be the best? And that is the only thing he accepts from himself. Unfortunately for him he now has an incredible fear of failure, and he is now inching closer and closer to having a nervous breakdown. He just hopes that his younger brother Tommy never surpasses his skills.

The next corner contains a less than jubilant Numbuh 3. She is normally the one who can't seem to control a serious ADD problem, but it seems as if she has actually managed to control it for now. Upon closer inspection it is obvious why. The homework assignment that she is working on is for her lit class, and she is reading A Rainbow Monkey Production of Hamlet. Shocking that such a childish image as a Rainbow Monkey could be used to act out a play where all the characters but one dies at the end. She actually seems to concentrating on it with all of her brain capacity. I wonder if they have a Rainbow Monkey version of Catcher in the Rye or Heart of Darkness. That would be an interesting read.

Numbuh 3's seemingly innocent play manages to keep her occupied, but she is paying more attention to the monkeys and no attention to the actual literature itself. Oh well, what can one expect when dumbing down a classic? This is so much like Hollywood making remake after remake of classic films, only to ruin the legacy of the former in the process.

Numbuh 5 is sitting right next to 3 and seems to be working on math homework. Wait, no, she is actually listening to her music. I can hear the headphones from across the room. It is funny how she looks like she is working. Of course, she is the stealth expert of the team. I can't believe what I am seeing, 2+2 does not equal 5. I hope she plans to go over the answers before she turns that in.

Finally, we come to the subject of this little research project, the one and only Numbuh 4, the "dumb one". He seems to be writing a history report. This could be humorous. What is the title? "The History of Television".

"Hey, Numbuh 5, what do you think of this sentence. 'Television was invented by Genghis Kahn in the year 1893."

"Numbuh 5 thinks that is just great Numbuh 4, great." She said that with an awful lot of sarcasm; I bet he'll lash out at her. He is one of those Neanderthal types with a propensity for violence; there is no way that he can't hit her.

"Thanks Numbuh 5, it is a great paper. This is one of my best papers eva'. You know, if ya need me to 'elp ya with your homework, I can offer my expertise to ya."

How is it possible that many of the members on this crack team are, simply put, stupid? We are talking about a world-wide organization with satellites, space stations, moon bases, and a wide variety of technological gadgets, and they are all manned by a group of morons. How did this happen.

An explosion rips the loosely attached boards from the wall and a grimly amusing robot appeared in their place.

"Mr. Wink, what do you think we should do with these disobedient children?"

"The same thing we do with all disobedient children Mr. Fibb, crush them."

The robots tentacles extended to great lengths at great speeds with the aim of pinning the small group of kids to immobility. However, they did have the reflexes of a battle hardened team; at least they are well trained in combat. That still doesn't explain how a special forces team is so slow in the head.

Wink and Fibb continue their gloating as the KND tries unsuccessfully to strike the robot's pilots. One by one the squid-like robot knocked each operative around the tree fort as if they were rag dolls. Each member managed to get back up after taking such an incredible beating, and each operative managed to put up an impressive fight. Unfortunately their efforts were all futile. Numbuhs 1 through 5 were unable to make a dent in the robot's exterior and it looked as if they would soon take a drastic loss in their own backyard.

Then, as if on cue, Numbuh 4 stood up after taking a massive blow to his solar plexus and started his charge. He dodged each and every attack that Wink and Fibb launched at him. Maybe it was an adrenaline boost, or maybe it was the fact that Wink and Fibb were unable to control five of them at once, but the interior range of the robot's arms was finally breached allowing Numbuh 4 access to the pilots' compartment. After giving Wink and Fibb an ungodly beating, they used their escape pod to eject.

Before they left, they shouted a threat to the hero of the day. "We will get our revenge stupid one. You just wait for our return. You and your friends won't stand a chance."

The pod took off into the atmosphere and the only thing that could be seen was a trail of smoke leading off into the distance.

"Whatevah, you just go ahead and bring it on. And I'm not stupid, I'm a genius."

All of the other operatives broke out into laughter despite their numerous injuries. After a rousing laugh they began to tend to their wounds.

"But… I am a genius, really."

Numbuh 5 walked up to the small Wally and put her arm around his shoulder, "Sure thing champ, Numbuh 5 believes you." She then began to chuckle to her self as she made cracks about her teammate under her breath.

Numbuh 2 then began to explain why Wally wasn't a genius, which further enraged the young hot head. "Well, if you're such a genius, why don't you share with us what you got on your last report card? Or why don't you explain to me how Genghis Kahn, who lived centuries before television was even created, was actually the one who invented it?"

All of the operatives just turned to stare at Wally as he thought deeply about how to answer Numbuh 2's questions.

"Well… schools is stupid." Wally's statement is riddled with idiocy.

The rest of the team didn't laugh. They just lowered their heads as they slowly walked out of the room leaving behind them an air of pity. The saddest part is the look in Wally's eyes; he looks like he actually believes what he just said.

Author's Note: So what do you think so far. I'll write the final segment based on your reviews. I am still not sure how I want to complete this. I really could go either way as to how I am gonna conclude this piece. I look forward to reading all of the reviews, and yes, that includes flames.


	2. The Answer

Ok, let me start off by saying that I don't KND. Wish I did, but I don't. Now, second of all, I would like to explain what I am trying to do here. When I hear people call Numbuh 4 "the dumb one" I get a little frustrated. I am trying to write this 2 part story as a way to explain his true genius. I have never written anything like this, so bear with me while I work on it ok. Now on with the show.

But I Am A Genius

Part 2

By OmegaRed9

Time: 4:04 pm

Location: Sector V Tree House

I could see the outlines of me mates underneath my golden locks of hair. My choice of haircut covered up most of my field of vision, but I have attuned a skill that heightens my other senses and provides me with a sort of sixth sense that amlalglamates all of my senses together. So now, rather than depending mostly on me sight, I can sense the location of anyone around me even if I can't see em.

I can even sense the giant robot that is about to crash through the wall. Its tentacles seem to have a way about them so as to allow them to extend, or at least that is what they sound like. I think that Wink and Fibb are the pilots of this cruddy machine. I can smell the cheap cologne wafting in through the small cracks in between the boards of ply wood. I instantly react and roll over to the one person I am most interested in protecting, Kuki Sanban. The feeling that I get as soon as I wrap my arms around her can only be described as uplifting. I get the strength of a thousand men and feel as if I can take on the stars themselves. Today, I may have too.

The wall is ripped apart like a paper doll and in steps a large robot of incredible proportions. I am not surprised at all, that is their usual M.O. My only concern is protecting Kuki's beautiful face from the thousands of splinters flying past us. The robot stands about 20 feet high and is a dull grey. It blended in nicely with the unforgiving weather behind it. The drizzle that the robot had to have walked in to get here gave it a shimmering affect that seemed to intimidate all of the other, but not me. I would not be scared by these two. Their track record against us aside, they still didn't stand a chance. That didn't mean that I wasn't cautious. I decided that I would stand back and await for them to make the first move and then strike after they have thrown their weight into an attack, thereby exposing their weakness. A machine that size, with that many tentacles, and with two pilots would most certainly not be the greatest balanced device, so I could easily throw it on its side after it throws its weight at me. That would leave those two dorks at my disposal. This should be relatively easy if everything goes to plan, but it never does.

The two pilots began to grin and did their usual gloating that would be expected from people with a false hope of winning. Their voices droned into my head making my fierce heart burn stronger to get this over with quickly.

"Mr. Wink, what do you think we should do with these disobedient children?"

"The same thing we do with all disobedient children Mr. Fibb, crush them."

Time: 4:06 pm

The tentacles begin to snap with each extension. Oi can hear the grinding of each cog wheel and gear as they move into place. This monster begins to move to life and takes a few steps towards the couch in the center of the room. Since all of the operatives were in the corners and sides of the room, we now surrounded the monster. This, however, did not work out to our advantage. Now every tentacle could be used as they surrounded this machine. Like a grenade going off, these arms shot out of the machine in a vain attempt to pin all of us down. We all managed to move aside despite their blinding speed. Our battle trained senses helped us predict where and when they would move. However, even the fastest warriors get hit eventually, and since we can not reach the pilot's seats, all we can do is dodge. The strength that those tentacles posses is immense; oi can feel my muscles straining to protect the inner organs that keep me going. Luckily, all of my training and fighting has made my body as hard as a rock and provides an almost armor like exterior to protect myself with. I can't say the same for my pals.

I can't see on the other side of the robot, but I can hear the screams of Numbuh 5 as the tentacles smash into her feminine figure. I can hear tendons tearing and bones breaking. I shudder to think how close we actually are to defeat. I look over to Numbuh 1 who is no more then six feet away from me. Usually he has some sort of plan or leads us by example or something, but he is pinned down by the robot. His glasses have fallen off and I can see tears welling up in his eyes. I always wondered why he wore the glasses, maybe that is why, so he doesn't appear weak when he takes a hit.

Time 4:07 pm

Suddenly, as if it were a knife stabbing into my heart, I hear the blood curdling scream of the one person that I had hoped had run off, Kuki. I could smell her perfume, a light lavender, begin to mix with the smell of blood. My eyes widen in fear for the first time that day. I swing around hoping that my senses have deceived me for once and am mortified at what I see. Kuki is hanging 4 feet in the air as the tentacles are wrapping around her. I can hear the tiny servo-motors (or whatever Numbuh 2 calls em) running at top capacity as they try to squeeze the life out of her. As I look closer I can see a thin red liquid begin to trickle down the black leotard that she normally wears and I am thrown into a fit of anger. I thrust myself toward her in hopes to get her out of the vice grip that cages her, but am stopped by Wink and Fibb. They had launched one of their tentacles at me when I was distracted and smacked me in the solar plexus. I drop to the ground in pain, but before they could come back for another hit I get up and start to maneuver my way toward them.

I turn my attention toward them and see the wide grins that they have on their faces. I can see their perfect teeth and I grow even angrier. They are getting so much joy out of hurting my friends. I charge forward. Each step I take feel like I am pulling a thousand pound weights behind me; all I want to do is get to the pilot's controls before Kuki and the others are killed. I can feel the boards squeak underneath me as I step on the cracks beneath my feet. The noise is unheard though; I don't know why, but I can no longer hear a thing. It is completely silent. I can see my friends' mouths open as they scream for help, but their pleas now fall on deaf ears. All I am concerned with is reaching my enemies and saving my friends in the process. I know that If I don't stop them, then my friends will soon be dead.

As I get closer and closer to my target, I can see the cockpit in much greater detail. There are numerous panels completely covered in flashing lights and buttons and switches. They are labeled with tiny plaques saying things like servo pressure regulator and main cpu transfer rate control. I have no idea what any of those thing mean, so I am secretly hoping that I won't need to touch any of those buttons in order to free my friends. I can now see small irregularities in the glass. Most glass panes have irregularities in them from the sudden cooling down that they go through after being formed. Normally these don't affect the performance of the glass, but if you need to break a pane then you should strike there. KND espionage 101, gotta love it. I decide where I am going to strike and I launch myself into the air with the intent to strike the glass and fight the two of them at once. However, I hit the glass with so much strength that I completely knock out Fibb and am left to fight Mr. Wink one-on-one. He is no match.

I smell his cheap and rank cologne wafting in to my nose and I nearly puke fro the odor. He sees this and tries to strike me while I am distracted, but I am ready. I saw his right hook coming from a mile away, and I block it. I counter with a knee to the solar plexus, just like they gave me. He starts to go down grabbing his gut from the pain, but as he does he swings his head down with incredible speed in an attempt to head butt me so as to buy him a little extra time to recover. He failed however as I cross my forearms into and x and place them directly in the path of his throat. I can see the look in his eyes as he makes his way down; he doesn't even notice that he is about to get the hurt put on em. When he gets trapped in my little trap I can see the look on his face. His eyes look like they are gonna buldge out of his face or somethin'. I grin despite the obvious pain that I am in. I can't believe he fell for it. As he is sprawled out on the floor of his tiny cockpit lying next to his loser pal, take a deep breath. I hadn't realized how much I was exerting myself.

Time: 4:08 pm

I grab him by the jaw and start to push each side inward toward each other. He screams in agony and tries to fight back, but the pain is so great that his punches are too weak. I whisper in his ear somthin about letting my friend go or he'll be eatin out of a straw for the next two years, and he flipped a switch. I then proceed to beat the heck out of him and his little buddy. I can't very well let em go without a few lumps.

After a few extra hits from me, mostly in the face and groin, they started to make their way home. Before they left though, they just had to make a threat. "We will get our revenge stupid one. You just wait for our return. You and your friends won't stand a chance."

I mull what they said over in my head as thir engines begin to glow and turn red. Their craft that posed such a threat to us took of with lightning speed leaving only a trail of smoke and a blood stain on the floor where it once stood.

"Whatevah, you just go ahead and bring it on. And I'm not stupid, I'm a genius."

All of the other operatives had this weird look on their faces after I had said that. They slowly began to smile and broke in to a loud laugh that could probably be heard for miles. I felt a little hurt. These guys were my friends and they were calling me dumb. I mean think about it, how could I not be a genius when I think of new combos and moves to perform on my enemies every day. It isn't fair that the word genius is only allowed to talk about people with book smarts.

I gruffly say, "But… I am a genius, really."

Numbuh 5 hobbled over to me. The pain she must have be going through just to come over to me must be intense after the absolute beating she took not 10 seconds earlier. If she weren't giggling so hard she would probably be sprawled out on the floor in tears. She wrapped her arm around my neck and rested her weight on my sturdier legs. I don't know if it was because she needed to rest her legs so she wouldn't fall or if she just wanted to put her arm around me to complete the condescending effect. "Sure thing champ, Numbuh 5 believes you."

Everyone got a good laugh out of that. I know they all think that I am clueless and don't know that they all think I'm an idiot. I do know that they always condescend me when I try to prove my true intellect. Numbuh 5 walks out of the room, probably to tend to her numerous wounds. After she leaves the room, I can here her whisper things like "Wally is an idiot" and "I can't believe that he is such a fool". It hurts. I try to prove that I am smart, the others refuse to believe me and try to argue . They say things about my report card and remind me of my reckless behavior and jumping into things without thinking first. What they don't realize is that I actually know what I am doing when I do those things. I trained myself to think in a split second so when I find myself in a tight spot I can keep my skin.

Time: 4:10 pm

I try to speak my thoughts on how smart I am, but I can't really acticulate what I have to say. I ain't good at that sorta stuff. Crud, I guess I won't be able to win this argument today. I guess I'll have to wait till tomorrow, but I won't give up on meself. I will convince my friends that I don't deserve to be called "the stupid one."

The End

Author's Notes: So, I bet it took you more than six minutes to read. That is why Wally is a genius. Sorry if I didn't have Wally's accent and usual vocabulary. I found myself getting so into trying to prove his intelligence that I switched into simply writing as if he actually used some word with more than three syllables. I did try to misspell a couple of those words though, just for continuity. I hope that you all enjoyed this little two-parter. Please read and review.


End file.
